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Friday, January 14, 2011

Trappings

when I make a post, I am trapped by it for the day, trapped in the thoughts that led to it, if it were a weighty one, trapped in the desires for response, trapped in the constancy of 'checking'.  its not so good right now, for me, and I don't like all the forced-ness that I feel to keep it up, to make something interesting in my words. so I am typing, but resisting... wishing it were more fulfilling.
on a note to satisfy chakraC and the crazy of my head... today hubsJ absconded with my car keys. . . and I was SO upset, after two days bound-in the snow and loving that time (mostly), I had one off to school and an actual plan. and then bereavement at the no-key state I found myself in. I was so crazy upset, internally, convinced that it signified a lack of respect and consideration on the part of HubsJ that EVEN I recognized it as wacko.  I got out my Byron Katie, people.  Byron of the crazyheads Katie.  and I worked it.  Is it true that HubsJ does not value ME because he took my car keys?
no.
okay. give me three reasons why it isn't true.  1. he calls me precious. 2. he wants to share his poetry with me sometimes. 3. He worries about my diet. 4. He is driving them home to me already when I call.

the guy probably loves me.
go figure.

untrapp-edly yours,
wmx

1 comments:

Still Life With Coffee said...

I really like how your brain works. I have totally had my husband take my keys but I was not so byron katie about it. ;-) Kudos to you.