Thursday, December 4, 2014


today i was nearly overcome by a dried hydrangea tumbleweed crossing the road.
gave me pause.
tested math facts for fourth graders. reminds me how much i love and how good i am at the one-on-ones with kids. i am. supahstah.
forgot to go to the library.
made plans to go to the funeral of my lifelong neighbor.
these times, they do change.  i wonder where i was all that time?
i'm waiting for the books i've requested to arrive at the library, checking on them doesn't seem to quicken the process.
sometime in the next week i have to buy a turtle creature, and all of its life-sustaining equipment. this, all, for a boy who is turning seven and has kept his interest in a turtle for six whole months.  he will still not care for it, and i will be scooping turtle poop for the foreseeable future.

so there.

what i mean, or think i mean, or , am thinking about.

dried hydrangea tumbleweeds. how fantastical.

having a job wouldn't be as good as helping out, i know this.

library schmibrary.

ahg. funerals, i got through most of my life without any true understanding of death. lucky me. but where was the 'I' that i have now? was it just tucked away behind the cupboard door? how is it that i am able to meet most of my fears on a daily basis and yet i am so overcome so regularly? what does this portend? how do i get out of this warren?

library schmibrary.

a birthday, a birthday. how i wish it were farther from christmas. but how lovely that the boy is so excited by a turtle, how lovely.  i'm purposefully getting a vegetarian tortoise to keep myself from having mealworms anywhere near my person.

and, so there, again.