Monday, July 1, 2013

Morose and Mother

My boy turned eight on Sunday and invited all the boys from his class to the house.  We got three negative rsvps and no others. in joking with him, i said if noone came, we'd take him to gocarts.  NOBODY SHOWED UP.

he got to go to gocarts.
it doesn't make things better.

now, my boy is wonderful, doesn't seem to have more than the normal social brouhahas, relatively at ease with friends and strangers. but NOBODY SHOWED UP.  school ended last week, many people set out for vacation mindsets with a vengeance, it was a sunday, we had only invited nine boys to begin with... his boy cousins were out of town and and and and and...  and so it went.

 he cried a few times upon realizing that the time to 'arrive' was far past and that, in fact, noone had come.  not as many times as i would have, but a few.  today he started a week of full day summer camp and so will be surrounded by kids and action.  he mentioned it again at breakfast this morning...nobody came to my birthday.  i think we're all freaking incredulous.
but i am flipping beside myself.  nobody came to my kids birthday party.  he had a cousin and his younger brother had a friend and then the grandparents.  i am devastated for him.

there isn't anyone to blame. (although i could bear some responsibility for not tracking down at least some definite rsvps, shitface.)

i could hardly sleep last night, i'm convinced this never happens to other people and that he may now have his pivotal moment when his life went to shit. my stomach hurts. 

i don't know what the hell to do.  he's too old to have this 'glossed' over.  it happened, for real.
what the hell.

how do i make him feel better? holy shit.

i think we'll have another party in august, before school starts and invite the whole fucking town of kids.  maybe we'll get some. . .


Amanda said...

I am feeling your pain, deep. While this hasn't exactly happened to us, my August-birthday-child now has her party in May after a couple experiences that teetered perilously close to yours.

Remember that this isn't a reflection on him as a child, it's a reflection on peoples' priorities at this time of year, and their manners in general. Once school is out, it's over.

Mama Mama Quite Contrary said...

Oh gosh Kate. That is awful! Poor kid. Amanda is totally right though-- it is the parents' fault for not RSVPing and it is not a reflection on your family. It is still a terrible feeling though. :(

MotherOfGooses said...

I agree. Poor kid, poor mama. The first time we sent out invites and people didn't RSVP, I was shocked. It is so rude. Don't take it on yourself. Sometimes there is such a disconnect. Some people think, "oh a party. oh just another thing to do or not do." Reality: a child has asked their child to come to their home for their birthday. If it was happening in front of them on the playground, they would surely have a different response. I feel your pain.