i might need to be medicated.
1. i can't get in touch with chakra carol and so i'm convinced that she has died because death is all i can see around me, the futility of life in the face of it, the inevitability of isolation.
2. wine does not work.
3. i am not a good time girl.
4. i literally barked at my husband in cynicisitic rage. no, i don't think that is a word either.
5. losing my faith has made me feel more lonely than I ever would have believed.
6. tigerscouts is rolling around again. shit. caucophony, is all i can say.
7. is being medicated like going through life a little stoned? i always said i didn't want to get through that way but i am worried my anxiety is growing into something unmanageable.
8. i can even be anxious on a beach. and that is sort of heartbreaking.
9. i'm scared of women. don't care much for men, as a general rule. but boy, i am intimidated by women.
10. today's dinner is supported by a new store i discovered, after following numerous rumors. hello, bags and bags of frozen soups. ( and a bread, and a bean and cheese quesadilla for the one who won't eat anything else.)
11. laundry ad more laundry and then more.
wanted to end at eleven, so did.
cheers.
7 Books and 7 Drives
10 hours ago
1 comments:
I had an epiphany the other week at a retreat, focused on redcucing anxiety.I've been treating anxiety like my ally in solving the object of my anxiety. The root causes are the enemy, not my co-conspirator anxiety. Turns out anxiety is one of my biggest problems. I need to stare it down. I never thought about it that way before.
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