Saturday, April 2, 2016

thinking about this stuff:

My ten year old made rainbow. he must be learning about grids at school.  I am going over it with oils... shared creating...
1. the effect of shame on creative ideas.

- i've been ashamed i haven't been making more stuff, expressing more joy through the color, and the make...  on top of the shame i have felt in my own personal home life. shame for the life i was living and for the constancy of my hope in the face of no-hope. lots of shame. SHAAAAAME. it was such a long time.  how long will it take to unravel itself?
so, now that that is moving slowly into a past tense, now what?

2. lots of women get divorce tattoos, evidently.  should i ?  of what? formless, over here. waiting for inspiration, or not, as the case may be.

3. i read this: in order to shed light, one must be prepared to burn.

dear lord.

i feel very teenagery these days, because i am in something of the same position, forming who i want to be in the face of a wide-open vista. with the added limbs of children and place.... how do i go forward, all Ganesh-d out?