I am a bit concerned about my wild and crazy needs here in the blogging world. I am bereft because I don't get a comment instantaneously with a posting. that is nutso. but true. There must be something big going on in my insides to be so content to while away my hours in type and in virtuality. Today I had my boys painting and I was THRILLED. boys ... painting, and I felt like an absolute BANG-UP of a mother... only some of it ended up on the sofa -great smudgy green handprint- and I realized that a GOOD mother would have foreseen that and covered the whole house in plastic. or some biodegradeable burlap or some shit. . .
once i find my burlap-wrapped camera, i'll show you something of it all.. .
welcome to mediocre motherhood. I have decided to just make my attempt to get by.
really. what is important to me is completely befuddling me these days. I actually don't know the answers to most of my most primal questions. I don't freaking know. My purpose is here and now and how I am getting sore muscles from typing. thats it. The kids are fine, happy to watch the night at the museum movie because it is so thrilling. though, honestly, i think the two year old just likes all the animal sightings. arghk.
so I am a bad mother again because they are watching tv instead of learing about organic broccoli. And I am a good mother because i do screen what they watch and they are well fed and they are loved. and what else is there? so the ying and the yang and the just get us all by.... wonder if god takes prayers online? this was mine for today. this afternoon.
“All I Want Is Everything”
20 hours ago
5 comments:
Okay...I'm only two minutes out...did I beat your clock? =)
Okay, I totally cheated and commented after your first couple of lines, hoping to make you feel better today.
I don't allow paint, markers, or stamps in my home. One day I will post a picture of the mural my 3 year old made on my living room wall of his sister...and I'm such a sap that I can't paint over it. No more though, I've seen to that, sold my stock in Crayola and everything! Then there is the matter of organic broccoli. The only thing my kids hate worse than broccoli, is organic broccoli. When they go to 'normal' people's homes, they gorge themselves on whatever they can get (so embarrassing) and then they come home and extol the virtues of all the conventional food they scored, to make their siblings jealous. I think this is a 'pick your poison' sort of thing! ;)
A couple of things. I just posted a new, really stupid post and then immediately checked to see if anyone had commented. Talk about needy, it's pathetic. I have Google Analytics attached to my blog so I can look to see who's looking. Clearly I am acting as a voyeur in my own life. Self-esteem issues? You betcha. My 4 year old is currently watching Iron Man, which by the way is completely inappropriate but I just cannot play Little People right now. I don't have it in me. I read a post somewhere that was discussing your favorite household chore. Seriously? No thanks, I hate all of them. So, I think you are holding on quite nicely, keep it up.
I think a good mother accepts that paint gets places it shouldn't and then lets it go. That is why I am not a good mother. Although I do have to say seeing Vivi's name written in her little preschool scrawl on the heater vent made me both angry and a little sentimental so it'll probably be there until she's grown.
it's nice to steal those moments!
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