Friday, February 26, 2010


I'd like to tell you that I can hear what is going on downstairs and that the kid is fine.
I would.
but I can't hear a damn thing going on down there unless the floor shakes, and then I assume something very very large has fallen over. and the kid is fine.
I ignore them. or, more appropriately, I put them on the back burner and hold a space for hope - that everything will be allright, that I have put all the knives in the holder back far enough that they can't be reached from the floor, that somehow doing this, this writing/communicating/plea-ing thing is important for my own development of self-worth, that my taking a break from the constant mom chatter of 'careful..' , 'get down from there now.'..., 'don't eat that' ... my break is important. i hold the space for the hope to grow. seedling, mud, destiny. you see?


Viv said...

I see. I understand. I live it. I think you should embrace it, I know I do...though with much breath holding.

Jen said...

Oh dear seed, will you ever grow? Here's what I am living with, "Mom can I play on your computer?" mom says no. "Mom can I play on your computer?" mom says no. "Mom could I please play on your computer?" mom says no.

They are addicted to all things electronic. Does this mean they are going to smoke pot? Ugh!

I loathe them right now. It's the boys. Girl good, mildly hormonal but good.

Glad you are better. Love that you ignore. You are a goddess to me!

Mamma Look said...

The other day the kids found me in the basement sitting on our old couch. "What are you doing?" "Mommy just needed a timeout." ENjoy those timeouts, it how we get through the day