Friday, June 4, 2010

ramble on, woman...

its a neighborhood, womanhood, a tv neighborhood, where we all know whats going on, we make wild and wooly judgements that sound wickedly funny as long as we keep pulling our shades down. We all have touched the fears or realities of being female... in college i remember the woman's center putting up posters all over campus that said one in four women would suffer abuse in their lifetime and there was a big hullabaloo because 'everyone' thought it was inflamatory and inflated. boy, was there a point missed or what. right? thats some of all of the people you know, none of us are untouched. none.

i find it amazing that any of us make it to whatever we choose to call adulthood without cracking up and leaving the building entirely. most of us don't kill our children, or our mates, we survive our families sometimes. we make families sometimes, we join families, make mates, leave mates, love children, hate them, lose them, never even get to meet them... and still manage somehow to walk around the neighborhood and be completely unrecognizable to each other . how is this possible? how is it possible that a man (lets assume hetero for ease of storyline) can ever say, 'gee, i didn't know you had so much baggage.'

do you know anyone who doesn't? literally?
it seems like we should assume women to be the bearers of the stories.

who are these fantasy women without baggage?


how can we escape becoming bad copies of our mother's worst character traits? our father's temper-bearing offspring?
off. spring.

what if our mothers actually were doing their best and somehow the best just contained what we couldn't tolerate? and now, in our lust for repair or revenge, we are turning somehow into that which they feared ? what if it is impossible to do anything else? what about making situations in which our offspring must grow and change and challenge, as part of the 'of course' way it must be, to ensure growth?

we insist on keeping our past static, when it is plastic. what of that? we freeze things which are in motion, still.


Jen said...

I choose to only hang out with woman who have a lot of baggage. And saddle bags. It helps me feel better about myself. I also only care for woman who are self-depricating and sarcastic. I find both of those to be absolutely charming characteristics. Truly. Honest woman are so much more fun to be around. Once the baggage comes out the really person shows up to the party. It's just more relaxed and fun. We have to be honest with each other, it's the only way we can survive, support and laugh with each other.