Monday, November 16, 2009

apologies o enlightened ones...

sorry about last night's boring post. i did warn you. it sucked. and its not even the flu that has hit here, though it may be a forerunner...vomit and poo, distinctly and from separate boys... which may be a blessing for them. and i'm supposed to be writing every damn day so I wasted a double posting on one day and now i'll be lucky if i make my own self-imposed mediocrity goal. agoodgoddamned.

*and i know now that the word i really like is 'biding', and so what I really like is not the 'imperishable truths' of abiding, but the adjective, i think adjective is right. maybe adverb..., a biding. i'm on hold, a waiting, a holding on, a dream of patience in there somewhere, a 'standing by'... maybe even holding the space, the time, for someone else beyond my own selfish self. maybe.

plus, my husband bought my kid a watergun. i know, harmless... a water pistol even. but this was after several conversations of 'i don't see why we should support the making of 'toy' weapons for the kids with OUR money, they make them themselves out of sticks, toys, etc.... , especially guns... there's no reasons kids should 'play' with a gun, no reason... '

at least, i thought they were conversations.... but no...

way, way early on i wrote really nicely about why i would never write about my husband. its here....
and its great, and i stick by it.
*& @# spit, spit, uppercut- uppercut. groin kick.
walk away with a swagger.
my job is done.
the weapon has been 'lost'. . .