Saturday, November 7, 2009

naptime action, and not of the sexy sort

check the times on the blogs you read. how many of them are written while a mom/dad is alone for 10 seconds while someone is napping? geez. for that matter, when are you READING? seriously, room of one's own? HAHA. i say HA HA, to you. All we need is 10 seconds and we are strangling ourselves to reach out.
and when the hell does the laundry get done? vacuum? feed ? cook? think? write? paint? breathe? 10 seconds seems like short shrift now. I'm verry tired right now, faced again with the dueling expectations for myself of supermother and housekeeper. I don't seem to be doing either very well and its wearing on me. I have a babysitter !! and all I can really manage to do in the four hours that she is here is go grocery shopping and browse the internet. it seems like something meaningful is missing. Maybe I, like so many others, need to limit my computer time and do SOMETHING.
Yesterday my old boy had his long day at school and I watched a movie of the cheesyromanticpop sort. Those things never actually leave me with a good feeling, I am always slightly depressed and missing the parts of me that used to believe in that crap. LOVE, yes. Romance? no.
but look at these shoes... this is what i wore on the night that didn't work out... now, think about what that could mean... and you'll be very very wrong. . . but i've had to struggle with a major self-identity overhaul. turns out, i am not a roller derby girl.

not even close.

so what the hell am



Athena said...

Well, for one thing you are a sassy writing mama, and that is no small thing.

I am not roller derby material either, as it turns out ;-)